[Pronunciations:
Weda’Sel (as it is spelled); Tirǽche (Tir esh); Sháine (Shah een); Urus
(Ooh roos); Chanré (Shon ray)]
Do I discuss the different meanings and benefits or
detriments of ‘Pot’? I think not. Considering my very conservative views,
that’s guaranteed to get me into a whole bunch of trouble. J
What I do want to share with you is a step back from
the previous post before Tirǽche went missing.
Explore my story a little further
with me in this segment of ‘Escape from Mount Vilipend’ where Tirǽche’s plans
with a ‘Pot’ produce totally unexpected consequences.
“Tell Weda’Sel
what you did, Mama. That was so funny”
giggled Sháine.
“Oh, Sháine”
sighed Tirǽche once more. “It wasn't funny at all, Dear; it was what I thought would be a quick and at the same time
entertaining way of getting everyone on their feet. Well that was the idea anyway. I was hoping to get people to start doing
what they've left to you for far, far too long, Weda’Sel; motivate themselves.”
“I’m intrigued,
Tirǽche” said Weda’Sel.
“Wait until you
hear what Mama did, Weda’Sel. You’ll
laugh too” said Sháine, her pride in her mother almost overcoming her.
To give an idea of size... |
“I asked Lostrol
if he could turn the inside of one of the carts into a large pot; large enough
to fit up to three big men in it. He
said ‘No problem’ and within half a day I had my pot; a functioning pot, mind
you, complete with lid; a ladder up the side; a wide-necked tap near the bottom
which allows one to draw off smaller amounts.
There was also a raging fire around its base. Do you know that Lostrol and the engineers
are absolute wonders? They took me at my
word and then set about ensuring that I would actually be able to cook
something in a pot that size; they even made the lip of pot overhang inwards to
stop the water from spilling out as the
cart drew the pot along – oh yes, it was half-filled with hot water too.”
“A man-sized
pot! By The Lighte, Tirǽche, what or who
were you intending to cook?” asked Urus with a fake grimace on his face.
“I wasn't intending to cook anyone, Urus! Thank
you very much” said Tirǽche as the whole countryside seemed to erupt in
laughter which didn't die down for a long time.
“It wasn't intended to be a real working pot” said Tirǽche quite uncomfortably. “My idea was simply to set a challenge. Anyone who could think of reasons to move
ahead with all possible speed was to be provided with a Place of Honour, so to
speak, on the ‘Hot Pot’ to sing a song to cheer everyone on; a variation of the
after-dinner sing-alongs which I enjoyed as a child; very basic I’m afraid.”
Everyone laughed
when Weda’Sel said “Yes, Tirǽche, I can see where ‘basic’ might be a
description for your ‘Hot Pot’”.
“It grew beyond
me, Weda’Sel. The next thing I knew,
everyone thought I was going to boil alive anyone who wasn't prepared to move.”
At the renewed
howls of laughter, Tirǽche drew herself up to her full height and scowled “It’s
not that funny. I think that that warped
idea about my cooking people might have come about because, when Vatrusha
presented me with a working pot, I suddenly saw a very real value in having a
moving cooking pot to cook for us even as we moved and thought we should rather
use the Hot Pot for that purpose and called for vegetables. Vatrusha and his engineers told some people
and, as these things happen, word spread, that the pot had to hold up to three grown
men. When I asked for vegetables, it
appears that everyone got the wrong idea.
They didn't want anyone they knew to be on the dinner menu.”
“I can identify
with that!” hooted Ninusa and then sucked air in through his teeth in
pain. He grimaced but waved off Chanré
who was ready to take him away to heal him.
“Later please, Chanré. I wouldn't miss this for anything.”
The entire group
listening to Tirǽche’s story were bent almost double and tears of laughter
streamed unheeded.
“I feel
awful. They all probably still think I’m
capable of doing such a dreadful thing” sighed Tirǽche.
“They probably
do, Love. Your name shall go down in
history as The Hot Pot Horror” chortled Urus.
“It’s not kind to play on peoples’ past fears, My Love.”
“Not you too,
Urus?” Tirǽche looked pained although
she couldn't hide the twinkle in her eyes.
“I thought I could at least count on your support, but you’re just as
bad as they are.” She swung her arm in a
wide arc encompassing everyone within listening distance.
Among the
renewed whoops of laughter, Stend, who was still wiping amused tears from his
eyes, hooted “This just gets better and better”.
He did his best
to compose himself and almost succeeded.
“That’s the
sight that greeted me, Weda’Sel” said Stend “row upon row of people scurrying
forwards as fast as they could, carrying anyone who looked as if they might
fall behind, jostling those in front to move faster. It was incredible.”
“It wasn't that
bad, Stend” said Tirǽche with a pained expression on her face.
“Oh? Yes it was, Tirǽche, believe me” replied
Stend through his laughter. Tirǽche
frowned and shrugged her shoulders in mock horror.
I thought I'd include a bit of 'That type of Pot' in a poem - sort of...
I thought I'd include a bit of 'That type of Pot' in a poem - sort of...
ADDICT
I think of you
Punch to the midriff
I think of you
My arms go weak
I think of you
My heart starts laughing
My blood gurgles too
As it recognises
My essence
Recognise
The essence of you
My fingers tingle
As do my toes
My face starts to spasm
And wrinkles my nose
My cheeks join in
Reaching up to my eyes
Which twinkle and sparkle
Like stars in night skies
I say to myself
There’s a problem here
How can it be
That I hold him so dear?
Then once again
I think of you
Punch to the midriff
My knees touch the floor
Legs which can walk for miles
Don’t make the door
So I say to myself
There’s a problem here
How can it be
That I need him near?
My Heart starts laughing
Shoots straight to the core
“I’m surprised at you Darling
So I’ll tell you once more”
“There’s nothing that you
Will be able to do
So I hope that at last
You’ll listen and hear”
“The only thing wrong
With you My Dear
Is the song in your heart
Of your love for him”
“Your very own Love Song
Which sings to your soul
The very same Love Song
Which sings to your Heart”
“You’re an addict My Dear
You’re an addict it’s true
You’re an addict I fear
That much holds true”
“The cure is a punch to the midriff
Each time you think of him
A punch to the midriff
When your arms go weak”
I laugh at my heart
As I think of you
I'll take that punch to my midriff
I’m fine with my arms going weak
I even don’t mind if I don’t reach the door
As long as I’m with you
I can ask for no more.
I think of you
Punch to the midriff
I think of you
My arms go weak
I think of you
My heart starts laughing
My blood gurgles too
As it recognises
My essence
Recognise
The essence of you
My fingers tingle
As do my toes
My face starts to spasm
And wrinkles my nose
My cheeks join in
Reaching up to my eyes
Which twinkle and sparkle
Like stars in night skies
I say to myself
There’s a problem here
How can it be
That I hold him so dear?
Then once again
I think of you
Punch to the midriff
My knees touch the floor
Legs which can walk for miles
Don’t make the door
So I say to myself
There’s a problem here
How can it be
That I need him near?
My Heart starts laughing
Shoots straight to the core
“I’m surprised at you Darling
So I’ll tell you once more”
“There’s nothing that you
Will be able to do
So I hope that at last
You’ll listen and hear”
“The only thing wrong
With you My Dear
Is the song in your heart
Of your love for him”
“Your very own Love Song
Which sings to your soul
The very same Love Song
Which sings to your Heart”
“You’re an addict My Dear
You’re an addict it’s true
You’re an addict I fear
That much holds true”
“The cure is a punch to the midriff
Each time you think of him
A punch to the midriff
When your arms go weak”
I laugh at my heart
As I think of you
I'll take that punch to my midriff
I’m fine with my arms going weak
I even don’t mind if I don’t reach the door
As long as I’m with you
I can ask for no more.
UPDATE: I reply to comments in the thread itself and not by email. If you want notification when I reply, please let me have your email address. Also, I no longer allow Anonymous comments due to Blogger's spam filter acting up and allowing more spam than legitimate comments. Sorry for any inconvenience.
I'm having flashbacks of Bugs Bunny cartoons, now, which is probably not what you intended.
ReplyDeleteOh my, Andrew. :) If that's what it is, that's what it is...
DeleteI hope you at least enjoyed Bugs Bunny cartoons.
Well, you know, the cannibals always threw Bugs in the big pot with the carrots and started cooking him, but he acted like it was a warm bath.
ReplyDeleteAnything with big pots in it makes me think of Bugs.
You get it. That was the kind of feeling I was trying to portray.
DeleteGiven the theme and what they've gone through, there has to be some levity in amongst the horror and fighting. Poor Tiraeche...
Thanks for the laugh.
They sort of spiraled down through this one! But everybody'll be fine, especially if the plot lets them be.
ReplyDeleteJohn at The Bathroom Monologues
That bad? I'll mark it for the death squad...
Delete:)